It happened today. A woman standing literally right next to me said to her friend that I must not have to respond to her e-mail because I am in HR. She actually insulted me in front of a handful of other people, and in front of me. I think she almost died when I actually said something back.
I usually respond to people with 99% strange calmness, but there is occasionally the 1% of passive aggressive tone that comes out but can only be seen by the trained eye. I was nothing but calm and kind to the lady drinking the Hater-ade, but my usual repertoire of exclamations and smiley faces in my eventual e-mail in this case was more like secret code for "shove it" as a slightly cathartic solution.
I can think of plenty of times that I have been yelled at, talked about, insulted, bullied, or poked. No problem, I can take it with the best of them. I had a man yell at me for ten minutes straight at a store because we didn't have any more gloves in stock for his kids at the end of the winter season. I really wanted to just offer to knit some for him, but I refrained and showed tact.
I know that staying cool and collected is not everyone's forte, but if you can do it, it is really fun and effective, don't you think? I sort of feel like I beat the game when I stay cool, and when other people stay cool with me, they are much likelier to get what they wanted. No one ever got what they came for when they yelled at me, and I hope they felt just a little bit ashamed inside too.
Hopefully I can keep my cool and stay nice. If not, then I will channel my very best Julia Roberts from "Pretty Woman" in the spirit of, ""Big mistake. Big, huge. I have to go shopping now."